No amitriptyline left in my system and no change to pain levels. They're still fucking horrendous at times, spesh as I'm not taking anything other than OTCs as breakthrough.
Have asked work for HR and Occ Health file, ostensibly to help with ESA medical, but we shall see what it brings up.
Less than six months to the wedding and I can't wait. Really should make a final decision about a dress though!
Pill reduction. Today - no naproxen or omeprazole, no iron supplement (yay), only 25mg amitriptyline. Tramadol and duloxetine as normal.
Slept well, except when giving myself a dead arm by laying on it. Slept from 02:30 to 13:00, only waking for pills at 6 and again at 12.
Headache mid afternoon (paracetamol did the trick). Nap 18:00 to 20:30. Headache again at midnight-ish. Paracetamol and bed.
Pain overall 4/10.
I like Christmas pudding.
I love not cooking turkey.
I can't handle this pain much longer.
I miss TBO after seven hours.
It was right to move when we did.
How lovely some friends' parents were when I was growing up.
That I am knackered far too easily.
Aspie boys need to be given present wish lists.
Always buy jammies you can wear outside.
Unless you're visiting a stroppy cat, when you should wear chainmail.
Red wine gets nicer the more you spend on it.
But most of all? That despite all the pain and shit bits, my life isn't actually that bad. Roll on 2012.
So, who am I and where did this all come from.
I've tried to blog before and it didn't work. Not sure why, I think it's because I did my usual thing of expecting excellence immediately, and comparing myself to people who have been blogging for years. And when I found myself wanting, I stopped. Because it's easier to stop yourself than (a) try and fail - or worse - (b) try and succeed.
Success is scary.
I've had ME since 2008. I've been working since I was 19, except for the past few months when the ME made me unable to do so. I'm really struggling with this, especially the fact that I tried to return to work but couldn't do it. That hurt me more than I can express to people. The fact that working for more than two hours a day made me so knackered I couldn't do anything else hurt.
I want to be able to work. But I can't.
Failure is scarier.
